Never Impersonate A Soldier
by sakachan
Summary: In an attempt to win Heero's affection, Relena tries to pass herself off as one of Heero's friends. Pairings: 1+2 Warnings: Relena chasing after Heero (felt I should warn you- it’s a scary thought!). OOC, character-insertion. Relena-bashing (whi


Disclaimers: I don't own Gundam Wing (who belongs to the same people I've told you about before). And I've told you all before that Nahiko is MY character. . . I guess I'm pretty much set for now.  
  
Note: I like Relena-bashing. I don't know why- maybe it's because she's such a bitch? I'll never know. . . But I apologize to anybody who likes her, and I suggest you not read this. I wrote this late at night, so excuse any problems it may have. I'll try to fix 'em as soon as possible. Enjoy!  
  
  
  
Never Impersonate A Soldier  
  
  
  
Nahiko walked up to Heero and looked dreamily into his cobalt eyes. "Hee- chan, why do you hide behind that stoic exterior of yours?" She put her hand onto his right shoulder, lightly playing with the material of his dark green tank top. "I know you see me as more than just a fellow soldier. . ."  
  
"Uhh. . ." Heero raised his eyebrow in confusion.  
  
"I know that you like me. I just want you to know, I like you to." She slid her other hand onto his left shoulder and wrapped her arms around his stiff neck.  
  
"Umm, Nahiko. . .?"  
  
"I know that you're with that Duo character. . . but I think that we have more in common with each other than you and him do. . ." She looked deeply into his questioning gaze.  
  
". . ." Heero wanted to speak, but he didn't know what to say. The blonde normally seemed so cold and emotionless. And now it appeared that she was madly in love with him.  
  
". . . And I think that we'd be better together than you and him." She put her face closer to his, speaking in a softer tone.  
  
'Okay. . . *this* is weird,' Heero thought. 'In this light, she looks almost like-'  
  
"RELENA!!!!" An angry looking blonde girl came storming into the well- lighted courtyard. She grabbed the other girl's hair and pulled her away from Heero. Off came a long, blonde wig.  
  
"RELENA?!!" Heero's mouth gaped open.  
  
"You stupid BITCH!!" The fuming Nahiko grabbed Relena's neck and shoved her against a nearby wall, maintaining the firm grasp she had on the shocked Queen-of-the-World. "Who the hell do you think you are, impersonating a soldier?!" She tightened her grasp. "More specifically, ME?!!"  
  
"I'm sorry, Nahiko. . . I didn't think you'd-"  
  
"Didn't think I'd what, MIND?!!"  
  
"No. . ." Relena was struggling for air. "I didn't think you'd find out." She lifted her arms and tried to free herself from the pissed-off Dokuen pilot's grasp.  
  
Nahiko raised her eyebrow and released Relena, causing her to land flat on her butt. "And *why* did you think I wouldn't find out about you seducing one of my team members?" She hissed, crossing her arms. "You know, I thought it odd when Duo asked me what I was doing back at the safehouse when he thought I had gone out with Heero." She turned to the dumbfounded Heero Yuy. "Hello, by the way."  
  
"I'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorryI'msorry. . ." Relena pleaded, bowing violently. "I didn't mean to upset you!"  
  
"Where I come from, impersonating a soldier is an act punishable by death," Nahiko calmly stated, putting extra emphasis on the word 'death.' "That sounds like a worthy punishment, wouldn't you agree, Heero?"  
  
"Uh. . ." The Japanese pilot still had trouble speaking.  
  
"I know you're the 'Queen of the World'. . . the only thing that can maintain peace. . ." An evil look crossed her face as she stared down at Relena, who was still gasping for breath. "Well, you know what? I don't care about that! I only see you as somebody who is too stupid for your own good." Nahiko pulled out a gun from who knows where and pointed it at Relena's chest. "Someone who will get us all *killed* eventually! Somebody who serves no purpose but to maintain peace between mankind." She started squeeze the trigger. "Personally, I think that if we let the colonies beat the crap out of each other long enough, they'll get too tired and eventually stop." She paused, and then lifted the gun towards Relena's head. "Besides, there are too many Peacecrafts around. And I like Zechs a hell of a lot more than you."  
  
Right before she pulled the trigger all the way, Nahiko noticed another gun pointed at *her* head. "Uh, Heero?"  
  
"Look, I want her dead just as much as you," Heero sighed. "But we need her if there's any hope for peace."  
  
"Yuy, I grew up in a world surrounded by war. So did you. I was raised from a young age to be a soldier. So were you." She lowered her weapon. "You've seen the same things I have. . . do you really think that *this* annoying little girl can lead an entire galaxy towards peace? Do you *really* believe that she will replace what the Sanq Kingdom lost? Are you *certain* that once she is in power, things will be better?"  
  
Heero lowered his weapon, and looked as if he had been smacked in the face. "I guess you're right, Nahiko." He walked over to where she and Relena were. "You probably know more about post-war governments than I do." Nahiko noticed that he looked hurt.  
  
"Tell you what," she said. "I'll let you do the honors." She looked down at Relena. "I guess you'll finally get that wish about Heero coming to kill you now."  
  
"Hee-chan," she cried, "you aren't honestly going to *kill* me, are you?" Terror swept over her cornflower blue eyes.  
  
"Don't call me Hee-chan. . ." he said as he lifted his gun to her head. "Omae wo korosu."  
  
A shot rang out and Relena fell to the floor in a heap. After a few seconds, Duo came running out to see what had happened.  
  
"Heero! I'm so proud of you!" He threw his arms around the stoic pilot, giving him a big kiss on the cheek. "You finally killed that bitch!" Nahiko started laughing. "Hey, Nahiko! Aren't you proud of Heero?" Duo gave Heero a tight hug, and stepped back when he noticed a smile on the Wing pilot's face.  
  
"Uh, Hee-chan?"  
  
"Nani?"  
  
"You're smiling! Oh my God!! Nahiko, what is so damn funny?!"  
  
Nahiko tried to stop for a moment, but couldn't find the strength. She had to settle for speaking between breaths. "She's not dead. . . Heero didn't. . . kill her. He didn't. . . even shoot her."  
  
Duo fell back, hitting his head on a pillar. "Ow. . ." He rubbed the back of his head. "But then how. . . why did she fall?"  
  
"She was so surprised that someone she cared so deeply for would be willing to sacrifice her, she fainted." Nahiko grinned.  
  
"However, Heero did a nice job of hitting that soda can over there. . ."  
  
  
  
Owari  
  
Tell me what ya think, you know I love C & C! ^__^ 


End file.
